Question

me dicen si esta bien?...

Answer 1

Tu escrito está mal elaborado por cuestiones de gramática y un poco de sentido común. Por ejemplo; no se dice "I went to bought her a gift" si no "I went to buy her a gift" ya que es la conjugación correcta. Tampoco se valdría decir "I returned to my house at 12:30pm" ya que fuiste a la casa de tu amiga  a las 4:00pm y en ningún momento especificaste cuando dormiste o si te habías transnochado. CORRECCIÓN:

Saturday was my sister's birthday. First, in the morning, I went to buy her a gift. After that, at 4:00pm, I went to her house and gave her the gift Then we ate and drank, and finally, I returned to my house at 6:00pm.